Feeling Disputatious

Yes that's right, I'm feeling irritable. And as a matter of fact, I have been fractious, fretful, prickly and querulous for about a week now. It is the new moon on Friday which could have something to do with it, a particularly heavy moon. Of course when I mentioned this to one of my schoolmothermates (that's fellow mother's at son's school) she tried her best to look at me as if she wasn't really thinking that I am slightly nutty. Maybe so, but I know I am made up of mostly water and the moon pulls on me the same as the tides in the ocean so why shouldn't that affect me in some way?

My dh found this 'Stellarium' astronomy program that shows the sky in realtime, a planetarium which allows us to watch the cycle of the moon through the planets, and there are some heavy things happening right now. I'm no way an expert in astronomy and I know a little about astrology, but I would say this program is awesome. Its also free. You can plot future days, years even to know what the sky will look like. You can also go back to the day you were born and see the sky as it was then.

In relation to my crabbiness though, a little meditation is in order. I do find it really hard these days. Walking meditation is every bit as beneficial as sitting, and I find walking is a good way of relieving stress. But as I usually have a little one with me, my attention tends to be on her and not really meditating. I have to try and sit while she's napping, if I can manage to ignorre the hundred and one other things that 'need' doing. If I can do that, then maybe I can salvage the rest of this week from the grumpy bin.

Don't you dare get that breast out...

I don't usually write on Friday, but as I was sat here and this little MSN pop-up story caught my attention and my fury about the sheeple in America.. I hope Veronika Robinson will forgive me for using her 'Sheeple' word, I love it, a combination of people and sheep, i.e. those who act like sheep, follow the crowd and do whatever they're told without question.

America, she can't stand up, can't say no... that's from some long-ago song swirling in my head, Throwing Muses I believe.. good ol' America kow-towing to the big business once again..this case in reference to a breast-feeding ad campaign that ran a few years ago, aimed at raising awareness and getting the shockingly low rates of breastfeeding up. The Bush administration (surprise surprise) is being questioned now about allowing such politcal interference (Formula makers lobbying power) in public health issues.

The article here says that these original tv ads were blunt and intended to grab your attention, in order to raise awareness of the benefits of breastfeeding your baby and the negative health effects of using dead formula milk ( I didn't see them). Of course the formula makers are a powerful industry and hence, lobbyied for a watered down version of the commercials which link ashtma and diabetes as a result of formula consumption and won their case with diluted, nearly pointless ads. I could tirade endlessly on the right to breastfeed and the utter necessity of it, but I'll leave it there for now. I think it was the Buddha himself that suggested we question everything, especially in reference to what he taught, he wanted his followers to question and make sure it rang true for themselves. Don't ever think that the media or the government are there for your benefit. The truth is inside of you.

Computer takes a day off

Our computer broke down yesterday - after two years without problems I suppose we were due. So a day without a computer, thankfully only a day, only a graphics card and power supply, not a hard drive or motherboard. I profess to being a luddite much of the time, but I do love my computer. There I've said it.

It was strangely quiet without its permeating presence, tucked into its little corner where it can survey the whole of our living room. I was convinced at times that I was hearing its gentle hum- even though it wasn't there, like feeling a phantom limb. And then there were the thoughts and ideas that popped into my head throughout the day, where I wanted to 'check it out online', and oops no- can't do that. The day was a bit more relaxing and peaceful in some way too, and I realise that there isn't really a day where I can abstain from the computer, unless I'm out of the house (or the computer is). The new drug of the nation.

A day without emails, myspace or facebook, so I sat and read, and played with kids, and read. I came across a sardonic article about Facebook and Myspace highlighting the fact that if your birthdate is before 1980 you will feel Really Old. I have joined both now, mainly by invitation from hipper friends (am I really a thirty something, boring, old, sometimes yummy sometimes moldy mother of two???), yet I don't expect to network with people I don't already know. I didn't think I'd find the time for such sites, just like blogging, and yet strangely addictive as these things are, I have pimped out my Myspace page and (gasp) invited other friends to join me on Facebook.

I certainly don't have much free time to waste, but I have to admit to enjoying eavesdropping on others 'walls' or Myspace 'conversations'. Its akin to being in a crowded bar and people watching, except you can sit in your pj's and go to bed when you've had enough. And if you've really had enough, then you can up and delete your profile and just quietly and pointedly disappear!

Please don't offer my baby sweets!

Phew, with all the Doctor Who stuff behind me, I can get back to some social, political and philosophical thinking! Well, only occasionally... I'm not itching for a fight, but I feel the pressing need to vent my frustation at this 'sweet obsessed' culture I find myself in. Now Americans have been the butt of many British jokes about obesity and foul diets, but I cannot recall so many sweet/candy eaters back in the states, as I have encountered living here.

Yesterday while out with my 18 month old, she was offered a jelly sweet, by a (well-meaning, I'm sure) shopkeeper, after putting away some toys she had been playing with. I am sure I did not imagine that the golden rule is to *ask* the parents first, before offering anything to the child, especially a pre-verbal one!!! But no, this was offered directly to my daughter.. and we are vegetarian (jelly's are made with gelatin). This is not the first time though. She was offered candy at one year old. We never gave our son anything resembling candy until he was at least 3, and then it was 'healthy' sweet stuff, and this was in America. None of his playmates at the time ate sweets either, or fizzy/carbonated drinks.

Its not shocking at all to see wee ones here holding a fizzy drink, crisps, sweets, or the ever popular 'juice' drinks. When it says juice drink, you can bet its never seen a fruit in its life. Then there's all the artifical sweeteners that just about everyone has seemed to embrace as sooooo much better than sugar. I'm happy to take the sugar, in moderate amounts, rather than some chemical created in lab which leaves an awful aftertaste in my mouth. But back to the kids...

Candy (or sweets as they are known here), is everywhere. My son never favoured sweets until he started school. Just about every Friday he'd come out with a handful, or on other days if it was someone's birthday, and 9 out of 10 times they were not vegetarian. In his Tae Kwon Do class, they are rewarded with sweets. In the shops, after school parents, on the bus, everywhere its SWEETS! Can't people see the rotten teeth and the ever enlarging waistlines of our kids??? And its fizzy drinks as well. Carbonated drinks erode the teeth every bit as much as sweets. I'm complaining because its very hard to escape. I remember one mother commenting to me about boundaries, in relation to something else, but it applies here as well.. she said its very hard enforcing your own boundaries when someone else has not set any for their kids. And it seems to cross social/economic lines as well.

When I pick up my son from school my young daughter is surrounded by other pre-schoolers filling their gobs with sweets. I provide healthy alternatives which appease her now, but it won't be long before she's asking for what they have, won't be long before I look like the villain for saying NO. I have been trying to be polite about it, by taking the sweet and disposing of it later, but when I have declined in the past, I've been told things like, 'oh its just a treat'.. a treat, implying a special occasion, once in a great while, etc.. which I don't see, what I see is everyday, after school, in the check-out line, just to keep them *quiet*.. which only works while their mouths are full, and until the sugar rush comes into play.. So no more Mrs. Niceguy, from now on, its PLUHEEEZE don't offer my kids sweets...

blowing gales, charlie horses, what next??

Well its blowing a cold gale outside and I am recovering from a charlie horse of massive proportions, with a baby who doesn't nap very much..actually she's one year old and is napping right now, but that's not the point! Its a New Moon tomorrow and I've had writer's block..so there you have it, the rant of the day.

I'm sure I've let some folks down by not writing very recently, and sorry for that, but I have been trying to focus on this business plan thing.

Its been a fairly mild winter thus far and now I suppose we are paying the price..two people have been killed by falling trees in the past 48 hours, maybe that's not alot for a country the size of Britain, but think about the freakishness/seemingly randomness of it. On Tuesday I suffered the worst charlie horse I think since I was a kid..I remember a particularly bad one when I was about 12 playing volleyball, when it kicked in I collapsed.. this recent little earthquake seized my calf and foot, with the epicenter in my arch, while my daughter cried from having fallen over..it was my quick attempt to jump up from a semi-seated cross-legged position to get to her (despite my illusions, I'm no yogini), that apparently sparked it. She then stopped crying to watch me agonize.

Diet aside, apparently these can come from just such silly movements. I'm assuming that was it, since I try really hard to balance my diet..or as I read, it could be the onset of Fibromyalgia... anyway it's taken two days for the entire pain in my leg/foot to ease up, and I've been having these visions of it kicking off again while I'm say, carrying my daughter down the stairs..ugh.. ok, enough of that, enough complaining for one day.